Life Update | A New Season of Change July 31, 2018 | I haven’t shared much on the personal front with you guys lately, so indulge me in a life update post…Here we are 5 months after our move back to Texas and I can finally say that I feel like I have my bearings. The ground was shaky for a while there and I have been in survival mode for most of 2018, but as the dust settles and God’s plan continues to unfold for our family I let my heart settle into the fact that this road has been paved long ago for us. As a quick refresher because there are quite a few of you who are new or semi-new here: I’m from Louisiana, I moved to Dallas after college. I met Dan (who’s from St. Louis) in Dallas and we were married in 2010. We both had careers here and in 2012, he was offered a job in Charlotte. I was pregnant with Landry and we moved across the country without ever really visiting. We both looked at this phase of life as a “stepping stone” so to speak and always knew that we wanted to build a life closer to our families. We spent nearly 6 years in Charlotte and honestly loved it more than either of us will admit. The east coast is beautiful, Charlotte is very up and coming and the people fully embraced us and essentially gave me this blog (my Charlotte girls, I will always be so thankful for your fierce support of this little space). After many many many prayers, Dan found a job back in Dallas that he was excited about and we decided that it was a good time to make the move closer to home. We’ve spent the last 5 months settling into our new house, learning our new town (more about that below), and establishing a new normal for our girls. Moving with small children was WAY more stressful that I has anticipated and really took a toll on us psychically and emotionally, but with lots of grace granted along the way I feel like we are thriving. A Season of Change | Moving to the Suburbs If you’d told me that I would seek a move to the ‘burbs when we lived here back in 2012 I would have LOL’d. But living in Charlotte and slowing down my pace I came to realize that I spent more time in the “burbs” than I did in the “city” and I really liked it that way. When we found out that Dan’s job would be in a suburb of Dallas called Plano, we both agreed that we would like to buy a home close by and cut out his commute. Side note: we both worked in Plano and lived in Dallas when we were here previously and the commute is anywhere from 30-60 minutes each way, which isn’t something we were willing to give up with two young kids. We truly LOVE our new area. Our home is less than 1 mile from one of the main highways that will get me into Dallas within 15 minutes, it’s less than 2 miles from Dan’s office, Landry’s school is less than a mile from our front door and within a 2 mile radius there’s a library, 5 Starbucks, Target, Whole Foods, Trader Joes, countless parks, amazing restaurants, every boutique fitness studio you can imagine, a kids museum and a huge mall. Truly, I have a little bubble now and it’s amazing that I never really have to leave it if I don’t want to. I will say this though, I’ve gotten lots of eyerolls about living in the suburbs and sometimes thats annoying to deal with. There’s an invisible line in Dallas somewhere and if it’s crossed at the northern most point, people assume you live in Oklahoma. It’s such an old school mindset, but it’s very much still going strong in Dallas. I’m always happy to tell people why and how we chose our new house and how it brings a ton more convenience to our family than somewhere in Dallas proper, but it’s always exhausting having to “justify” your decision when it’s actually been one of the best you’ve made in a while. A few of you have asked about the differences between Dallas and Charlotte and I will say they are starkly different. We miss the landscape, the trees and the slightly milder weather A LOT. We miss the healthy active vibe where EVERYone is outside biking, running or walking their dogs. What we do appreciate about Dallas is the endless amount of things to do. I can easily keep the kids busy all Summer but countless museums, parks, splash pads, pools…you name it…and there are always fun new restaurants opening and different spots to check out. It’s a faster pace and I like it. There are also MANY more drive thru Starbucks…and if you live in Charlotte, you’d appreciate that. A Season of Change | School! This is a big one y’all. I feel a pit in my stomach just knowing that I’m going to write it all out. My big girl is going to Kindergarten. She will be gone from me for 7-8 hours a day and I am devastated to let her out from under my wing. That sweet baby has taught me so much, brings me so much joy and really is the calm to my daily storm. I know that seeing her off to school and watching her flourish will also bring me joy, but I will mourn not having her by my side most days. She’s craving friendships (since she left all of her close friends behind in Charlotte), she loves learning and will also really appreciate structure and scheduling so I know that this is going to be a great season for her. For me though, it marks a distinct change and closes the door to an era of innocence and protection that I will never get back as her mama. A few people asked about how we chose public vs private school. Landry is going to the public neighborhood elementary school down the street from our house, which is another part of the reason that we chose to live where we did. The schools are ranked very high and are challenging and diverse which was all very important to us. Should we have stayed in Charlotte, she would have been in a private Catholic school, because our school zone there was not ideal. I think that it’s very situational and dependent on the child + the parents will to thrive. I went to what would be considered terrible schools growing up (we didn’t know any different in my small town) and got a full scholarship to college and am doing just fine. If Landry doesn’t thrive in these big public schools then we will consider private. Mommy + Me Day for Breakfast, Registering for School and Shopping for School Clothes! The most significant change though has to do with Lawson girl and Dan and I deciding that more of a structured, full time child care option is what’s best for us. I’m crying as I type this. I’ve been building this business for 5 years now and have grown it through pregnancies, sleepless nights, no naps, no childcare, moves, and really stormy seasons. I’ve given myself very little grace and skipped maternity leave, pushed myself to wake up extra early and stay up way past my bedtime to make sure that it stays afloat. I’ve never worked harder for something in my life and I want to see it through. I’ve had VERY little luck with part time nannies and they all end up being way more work than they are worth due to lack of reliability and flexibility, so we are choosing the more structured group child care route and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t torn up about it. I’ll have the option to send her full time, but plan to send her Monday-Thursday 8-3. I’ll scoop her up when I pick up Landry from school and my hope is that I will have 4-5 devoted hours with the girls where I am not worried about work, or social media, or looming deadlines. I will have gotten that stuff taken care of during my structured work day (which will be a luxury that I’ve never known) and will be able to be phone down with them enjoying the afternoon. I know that this is the right decision and that she will do amazing (she loves being around other kids!), but please say a little prayer for this mama who is letting Mom Guilt absolutely cripple her. Season of Change | New Home We’ve been in our house for a little over 4 months now and it’s really an ideal home for our family. Of course, it has it’s quirks and things that we want to change, but overall the location and layout are really perfect. The ceilings are high, there’s breathing room, tons of natural light and we just adore how things are laid out. I went hard in the beginning trying to get things sorted out and decorated and then took a hiatus until a few weeks ago when I felt ready to dive back into decor. There’s quite a bit going on behind the scenes and I plan to share over the next few weeks, mainly on stories. Here are a few photos of what it looked like when we bought it. Entry | Formal Living + Dining Living Room Kitchen (staged) Living (staged) MBR (staged) Master bath (staged) Landry’s Room Playroom Looking at these, I’m thinking that it’s crazy how far we’ve come already and am giving myself a little pat on the back. It’s SO hard to move into a new house and let the thoughts of decorating it and filling it consume you. Thankfully, I was able to pull in the reigns a little and am feeling happy with the pace we are going. I will say though when I first started this blog (it was WAY more decor focused at the beginning), I was always hungry for a home project. Something to tackle, something to paint, something to refinish and now I feel the total opposite. I want to think long term, pick out things that I truly love and decorate it in a way that will make us happy and comfortable for years to come. What we miss: our yard. Our home in Charlotte backed up to a greenway, so we definitely miss the Season of Change | All the Shiny Things I have to say that being back in Dallas is quite the culture shock after 5 years in Charlotte. The pace is faster and I feel like things are quite a bit more competitive in the “keeping up with the Jones’s” way, which I didn’t miss. I actually grew to love the humble pace of Charlotte. Most moms drove mini-vans, houses were nice but humble, there weren’t as many competitive activities for kids…you get my drift. Dallas is full of Range Rovers, McMansions, and $30k millionaires. It does keep me on my toes, but it’s not a trap that I want to fall into. It’s a daily challenge to ground myself and not get caught up in all of the shiny things….living below our means, to only buying what we can truly afford and not pretending to be people that we aren’t. It’s so hard to step back and put things into perspective though, so that’s just my take on it all 🙂 Season of Change | Friends, Church, Etc. Although we’ve settled in for the most part, there’s still quite a bit to figure out…like friends, church, and how we really want to plant our roots here. Finding friends in your 30’s is not easy. I haven’t really met a good group of girls up here yet, and that’s ok. I know that it will come and in all reality I don’t have the time to be a good new friend right now. Thankfully I have my lifelong friends in Dallas and they’ve been so wonderful to include me in so many things. I am so excited for Landry to start school because I know that she is going to be SO happy to have friends again! We are also trying to figure out a new Church family. Dan and I were both raised Catholic but are both unsure that that’s how we want to raise our girls- so we are at a crossroads. Say some prayers that the Lord leads us to where we are supposed to be 🙂 Although there are many things that we miss dearly about Charlotte (especially friends) overall, we are so thankful to be closer to family, friends and home for me. We are excited to dig our heels in and plant roots for our girls. Although there are many things that we miss dearly about Charlotte (especially friends). Ok that was very long and very personal. All things that I’ve been meaning to write out and share with you guys…so if you’ve made it to the end, thank you!
Jessica says July 31, 2018 at 9:01 AM Hey lady,I think you’re doing great! Congratulations on getting settled and controlling that Jones’ competition and coming to that hard decision of school for the girls. My son and your youngest are about the same age and we decided to put him in a structured “school” for the first part of the day, as well. So you’re not alone in the battle of “omg I’m sending my 1 year old to school! I’ll be sending him/her away you school for ever. Should I start now!?” It’s hard to decide and we feel guilty bc technically we r a SAHM, right?! But you and Dan kno best and your girls will do great! And, I think, also just as important, u will do great. I, myself, am kind if getting excited for my little guy. I think it’ll be a huge shock at first but that he’ll end up loving it. Plus I’m going in August to get him some little shoes and a tiny backpack. (Ek! He’ll b so cute) I cannot imagine living in a city that is more money and appearance oriented than Charlotte. That has to be hard. Being from casual Georgia, Charlotte is beautiful but still has a competitive appearance vibe to me. I find it hard to not get caught up in it so ????on surviving Dallas! Mercy! I pray u guys get plugged into a great church with a wonderful, supportive family community!
Jennifer says July 31, 2018 at 9:03 AM Thank you for opening up. My husband lived in Dallas, Myers Park area for his high school years. It was definitely a culture shock when he moved from Michigan. Stay true to who you are and everything else will fall right in place. It just takes time ????. Prayers for a smooth transition for Landry when she starts school! She will love it and this too will open the door for you to meet new people. And by putting Lawson in childcare you will be able to volunteer in Landry’s school. It was really hard when my youngest was little and I wanted to volunteer at my daighter’s school but didn’t have childcare for the littlest one. Once my daughter went to preschool it freed up so much time for me to volunteer and do the things I needed to get done without feeling guilty. I will also say finding a church one the best thing we did when we moved to charlotte 11 years ago. It definitely took time but I can say some of my best friends are girls I met from church in those early years…. I too was raised Catholic, but we ended up finding a Methodist church we both loved and felt like it was home. I love following you because you are so real and aren’t afraid of putting your feelings out there! Hang in there and good luck with school and the transitioning of Lawson going to daycare. She will do great and will love the social interaction with other kids her age ????.
Jackie Johnson says July 31, 2018 at 9:53 AM I loved reading this and hearing how y’all are doing! I lived in Grapevine for several years and loved visiting the Plano/Frisco area but the keeping up with the Jones’ battle would be tough. You sound super level headed about it which is the only way to be! A couple recommendations! Hairstylists: @prettylittlestyledallas (based in Frisco). She is amazing and I think one of her girls is about the same age as Lawson! Look into The Village Church. Matt Chandler is the head pastor and he is amazing! I still listen to his sermons. They have several locations but the one in Flower Mound is the main one. Also, my husband’s cousin lives in Frisco and has two little girls, the youngest is probably around Landry’s age. They could be good couple friends! Anyway, I can connect y’all if it’s not too weird! Ok that’s all, enjoy a mambo taxi for me!
Jackie Johnson says July 31, 2018 at 9:55 AM I loved reading this and hearing how y’all are doing! I lived in Grapevine for several years and loved visiting the Plano/Frisco area but the keeping up with the Jones’ battle would be tough. You sound super level headed about it which is the only way to be! A couple recommendations! Hairstylists: @prettylittlestyledallas (based in Frisco). She is amazing and I think one of her girls is about the same age as Lawson! Look into The Village Church. Matt Chandler is the head pastor and he is amazing! I still listen to his sermons. They have several locations but the one in Flower Mound is the main one. Also, my husband’s cousin lives there and has two little girls, the youngest is probably around Landry’s age. They could be good couple friends! Anyway, I can connect y’all if it’s not too weird! Ok that’s all, enjoy a mambo taxi for me!
Glo Gaddis says July 31, 2018 at 10:37 AM We are from TX living in ATL. We lived in Flower Mound. I just wanted to suggest you visit The Village Church! The main church is in FM but there is a Plano campus! Matt Chandler, the pastor is amazing and the children’s program is so good for your girls ages! Google and listen or watch Matt’s sermons! Also my son recently took me to Ida Clair fun and delicious restaurant!!! Blessings to you!
Mel says July 31, 2018 at 11:22 AM I’ve lived in Dallas proper for over 10 years and I totally know what you mean regarding the competitive, “keeping up with the Jones” vibe. I moved here from Colorado right out of college and I can honestly say that despite that vibe, it’s still got the enough of A Texas vibe that there’s no where else I’d rather be. I would encourage you to try out Chase Oaks Church, in Plano. They have an excellent children’s ministry. The kids I know love it – that’s partially due to the giant slide in the middle of the lobby ????. And their pastors are down to earth and have a heart for the people of the DFW area. Of course, we’ve been going for over 10 years, and we have driven the distance for most of that time, if that’s any indication as to how much we love it. I’ll be praying that you and your family find the right church for you, and that God will continue to bless you and keep you in His perfect peace through this transition!
Jacy Leonard says July 31, 2018 at 11:24 AM I think this was my favorite post of yours yet! Thanks for opening up and sharing. I’m excited for you for your new ‘work week’ opportunity! My son is the same age as Lawson and he goes to daycare part time and loves it! It’s been a great fit for us and I bet it will be for you all as well. Best of luck!
Jennifer says July 31, 2018 at 1:39 PM Thank you for opening up. My husband lived in Dallas, Myers Park area for his high school years. It was definitely a culture shock when he moved from Michigan. Stay true to who you are and everything else will fall right in place. It just takes time ????. Prayers for a smooth transition for Landry when she starts school! She will love it and this too will open the door for you to meet new people. And by putting Lawson in childcare you will be able to volunteer in Landry’s school. It was really hard when my youngest was little and I wanted to volunteer at my daighter’s school but didn’t have childcare for the littlest one. Once my daughter went to preschool it freed up so much time for me to volunteer and do the things I needed to get done without feeling guilty. I will also say finding a church is one of the best things we did when we moved to Charlotte 11 years ago. It definitely took time but I can say some of my best friends are girls I met from church in those early years…. I too was raised Catholic, but we ended up finding a Methodist church we both loved and felt like it was home. I love following you because you are so real and aren’t afraid of putting your feelings out there! Hang in there and good luck with school and the transitioning of Lawson going to daycare. She will do great and will love the social interaction with other kids her age ????.
Diane says July 31, 2018 at 2:32 PM Just wait until your little one starts school and you find your mom tribe. That was something I wasn’t expecting when my 7 year old started and it has made such a difference in my life! I have life long friends, but they’re not in close proximity to me and it’s so great having friends within five minutes whose kids go to the same school and church!
Cameron Green says July 31, 2018 at 2:43 PM Just wanted to tell you that you do an excellent job balancing being a blogger and keeping an optimistic outlook (which I totally appreciate), yet showing us the real-life struggles. You give us so much when you tell us stories about your struggles which I can completely relate to. When you moved from CLT to Dallas, I was thinking to myself, “how does this woman have the energy to do it all?” I’m happy you will hopefully find a balance that we all strive to find and that those hours in the day without the kids go by quickly and in addition to working life, you get some time to yourself before they come home from school/daycare. From the outside looking in – you do a great job of blogging, spending one on one time with your kids, spending time with your friends, creating content for us, and making me laugh. Well done!
Gloria Gaddis says July 31, 2018 at 2:51 PM I am from TX…living in Atlanta now. We lived in Flower Mound for a few years and we were members of the Village Church. There is now a Plano Campus! Matt Chandler is an amazing teacher/preacher and a very special friend. Google his cancer story and watch/listen to a sermon. The Village has a fabulous children’s ministry too! Blessings to you. East TX is home and I miss the Tx-Mex and Whataburger everyday! My son lives in Midlothian (south of Dallas) When I visit we love to go to Bishop Arts to eat…Hatties, Enos, Stock and Barrel, Gloria’s, Tillman’s, Pie Emporium, and Odd fellows. Also YA YA foot-spa is a treat! Ida Clair is another good restaurant not to far from your area! Enjoy!
Gloria Gaddis says July 31, 2018 at 3:08 PM Sorry I posted twice! My computer was giving me an error msg! more info on second post!
Carolyn says July 31, 2018 at 3:03 PM Some of my closest friends now are moms of my 11 year old daughter’s friends, moms I met at dance or pta or playdates or softball. Your circle will grow along with your daughter’s. And then they play w their friends and you get to see yours. It will be awesome!! And it sounds like you have made the best choice for your little one. Focus on work, then focus on them. I work from home and trying to with little ones around you always feel like you are failing at everything. I get it. The separation in your day will come to be a blessing, not a regret. My little one will be going to K this year. And while we wont have library story hour or a grocery shopping buddy…she is ready, and I am ready to be able to focus on work without distractions. As far as church…I recently saw a friend on Facebook ask for dates to church. Meaning, to be invited by friends and go along with them to their churches as a guest. Try all denominations and multiple of the same. She went to a different church every Sunday for a few months and loved the exposure to different ways to worship. And by going w someone you know, it may not be as intimidating. Good luck with everything-you got this mamma!!!
Tracy says July 31, 2018 at 3:42 PM Attend all the kindergarten events at school and the birthday parties. Some of my best friends are the moms I met when my oldest started kindergarten. Best wishes for your family!
Jessica Dvorscak says July 31, 2018 at 4:34 PM I just want to say that I’ve been reading your blog for several years and I think you are doing an amazing job. I love your posts about fashion, home decor, food, mommin’ it…I guess I really like that this is a diversified place because aren’t we all a little diversified in our interests? I can relate to your struggle as a mom trying to balance it all and just wanted to tell you that what you’re doing isn’t going unnoticed. Thank you!
Jessica Mainwaring says July 31, 2018 at 8:45 PM I just wanted to say hi and that we miss you in Charlotte. I’m glad to see you guys are getting settled and doing so well. I can’t believe joss and Landry are off to kindergarten!!! Crazy how time flies, but I know both of them will do amazing! I hope you have a great rest of your summer.
Pat says July 31, 2018 at 11:05 PM Great post and I always appreciate your being “real” in this land of so called “perfection”. 🙂 I think you do an amazing job with IG, blogging, your children, family activities and more. It’s such a major change when your children start to school…but everything will settle in and they will be fine! Just be prepared for every kind of illness & I really don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer. It’s just reality with school and day care. I’m sure having more time for you and your responsibilities will be a tremendous help! I was born in Dallas but moved to a very small town south of Ft. Worth during first grade. Growing up in a small town is great for so many things but honestly, nothing to do, especially for the teen years. I treasure that opportunity though and remain in touch with so many from school. Most of my mother’s family always lived in Dallas…now most all the cousins do. I just can’t do the competitive nature of keeping up with the Jones’s! I’m just me and grateful for what I have. 🙂 Wishing you the best and hey, anytime you’re at Mi Cocina, have a Mambo Taxi for me!!
Amanda says July 31, 2018 at 11:08 PM We moved from Portland, OR to Orlando, Fl last year when our girls were 3 and 15 months. It was much harder than I thought it would be and just starting to find mom friends. Also, just a different vibe here like you were talking about that is hard for me to get used to. My girls have been so resilient and learned so much. My oldest always loves to try new things and meet new people which makes my heart happy. I lived in Colleyville close to Plano for two years in high school and met the most welcoming, kind people. Try many groups to find community and school will help so much. Don’t feel guilty about child care you are an amazing mom with a passion and your girls will notice. My oldest says you are happy with your work and we are happy at our school so I love you.
Shelly Conselman says August 1, 2018 at 12:00 AM This post spoke to me on SO MANY levels! First if all, I lived in Dallas (and even went to SMU), so I know allll about that “invisible Dallas County” line and the keeping up with the Jones and all the conspicuous displays of excess. It was exciting in my twenties, but now I long for a slower, more humble pace of life, too — which is why we moved to the. Austin area. I’m also sending my big girl to kinder and one year old to MDO 3/week and I get nauseated with anxiety just thinking about it! And yes, it is so hard making new friendS in your 30s. As always thank you for your transparency and honesty about motherhood. Best of luck with this new season!
Carolyn says August 1, 2018 at 9:24 AM Loved this post! I now live in Charlotte, but having been raised in Plano since I was 3 years old, I think it’s a great place to raise a family. No one should poo-poo the suburbs! Some of my best friends are the ones I met in kindergarten and first grade, and I am so grateful for my time there. As a graduate of Plano Senior High, I have all the faith that Landry will thrive in Plano’s public school system. My parents also chose the area specifically for the public schools, and that was many, many moons ago. Glad not much has changed! I had great teachers who pushed me, and the environment taught me how to work with lots of different types of people. I hope you and your family have the same experience — I’m proud to be from there! Wishing you all the best (and also lots of peace) during this time of change!
Emily of The Three Bite Rule says August 1, 2018 at 10:21 AM Thanks for sharing! Congrats on all you’ve accomplished and all you are looking forward to! You likely don’t need to hear it again, but structured school/play for tiny ones can be so great! I’ve been so grateful my toddler can learn from different people, and from other kids. I also think them learning to sleep & eat other places is such a great life lessons too! Your little ladies will grow up with such a sense of team and a family-unit that both parents work really hard and also devote time to family separate from work at home. You’ve got this!
Lindsay says August 2, 2018 at 12:05 AM I enjoy following you! Growing up in Plano, there are so many wonderful Catholic Churches that you can get plugged into. I pray for your family to find one! Prince of Peace or St Francis of Assisi have so much to offer.
Anna T says August 2, 2018 at 9:32 AM Great post! And you know what half the time the littles prefer being at “school” playing with friends… who hasn’t had the “mum, you are here already? Can you come back and pick me up later?”. It will allow you more time to do things that matter to you, and make you the best version of you. Mommy guilt is always there… no matter what we decision we make. You got this!
Connor says August 2, 2018 at 1:58 PM This post is just wonderful, and your openness is the primary reason I absolutely LOVE reading your blog. You don’t have to be so honest in this online world, but I love that you are! As a working mom, I 100000% understand how hard it will be to put Landry in a school program, but I know she will thrive and so will you. I think if you are doing what you know to be best for your family (which definitely includes taking care of yourself), then your girls will be happy and healthy and thrive, like they already seem to be doing. Lots of hugs to you! Again, thank you for being so open and honest. It is refreshing and I keep coming back to support you because of that.
Mary Fields says August 5, 2018 at 7:52 PM Hi Mallory, You will meet so many women at preschool for Lawson and kinder for Landry. Take your time at drop off and visit with the other moms, do the same at pick up. You will form friendships fast. As for the competition, focus on your marriage, your girls, your amazing job and your faith. Everything else is just background noise, but it is hard to ignore!! Especially at The Shops of Legacy. ???????? Have you and Dan ever gone to Waters Creek in Allen? Great place for dinner for young families with a big green space for kids to play. Also, a Mi Cocina, village Burger Bar, Pacugio and lots of great stores. Moving is hard! You are doing a great job!!
Nichole says August 5, 2018 at 7:59 PM I lived in Plano for years and graduated from Plano Senior HS, it is a great place to raise your kids and has so many things so close by. We lived in Willow Bend and I can’t imagine a better place to have grown up. Good choice!
Lauren A Kokotan says August 9, 2018 at 9:27 PM Your family is so cute and I loved reading about your life update! I am so happy to hear that things are ironing themselves out. As a mom to a 5 yo boy who is going into his third new school in as many years (first full day – Kinder!), I can tell you – they adjust so quickly and he has kept friends from each school (only one is moving to the same new school with him). Landry will do great! Good luck with everything going forward, I am looking forward to reading about how things go going forward! <3